Happened again

[Rita]

You were born for a reason. God knows what you are suffering, He knows everything. And everyone here knows how low we can all sink, how bad the pain is. You are not alone! We all understand!

Lately I have been seeing my pain from MLC as a wound like any other. When I had surgery, the pain after was very bad, but I didn't expect it to go away overnight. I continued to make my dinner and eat it, take care of my kids, walk to the store, etc., with the pain. When I realized that my broken heart is a pain like that, I have been able to keep walking much more confidently the last few weeks. When I feel the waves of pain, I just tell myself, "yes, that's the wound that was already there. It's going to keep hurting. I can keep living even though I have a terrible pain."

You are in intense pain, but that's just the bodily part of you. There is much more to you than that. How do you know that the entire purpose and plan for your life is not going to come out of this moment? You can use your life for great things if you can let go of your feeling that this one person is the meaning of it. She is not. If one of us were standing next to you right now and asked you to do something we needed, I am sure you would put your pain aside for a moment to help. There is always something else, some reason for us to keep walking. You may not know what that is right now, but if nothing else, you can be sure that your children need you and that they need to see you face your troubles with strength so that they can do the same when they have troubles.

I don't know what Job thinks about it, but it sounds like in this moment, you need much more than this forum can offer. We are here for you but you need immediate care in person. Maybe if you can Job your home state, she can look up some better options for you to get some immediate care. I know you can also find nearby providers who take your insurance and may be able to talk to you on line and immediately on amwell.com