DB / Detach- Will we ever piece it together

[Did]

Better to write here rather than do it in real life right? I still have the desire to bring happiness into each others lives. But I understand her happiness is not my responsibility and vice versa. She sent me this article the other day about toxic relationships and something about her type being uncomfortable with intimacy and needing to lean into the discomfort. Its like she wants us back and me but cant / wont do it. She talks about being jealous, having feelings, facetimes me every day etc... I guess could just be temp checks constantly. But I havent been jumping at her. Trying to just be consistent and keep my cool, do my thing.

Although I did sleep up a few days ago and we got into an argument the toxic relationship article she sent me. That must have been Friday. She talked about her progress and being centered when we argue - she used to say go F yourself and things like that anytime we fought. We talked on the phone at like 11pm that night after she had been drinking. She sounded so much calmer, like her guard was down letting herself be feminine and cute instead of tight, walled up an tough. Then Saturday she was here to pick up D4 and I was calm, cool... went well. Since then limited contact but positive when we interact....