It didn’t make me feel control, it made me feel like his mom or something. It’s prob what I would have done in our marriage, but once all this happened a year ago I stopped holding him accountable for anything and it got me nowhere. I don’t know. I literally feel like he won’t give me a break. Maybe it’s just in my head. But my emotions are so heightened it’s like is he testing me constantly for a reaction or am I just being crazy?
He has to know id wonder where he’s going next weekend. I know I keep saying I want to detach bc it’s all I want. I don’t want to feel all this hurt from everything he does. I don’t even know what to believe from him anymore bc he’s so unreliable with things he says and does. This truly is a marathon not a sprint and sometimes I just don’t know if I’m really strong enough for what it takes to DB. It would definitely be easier to lash out and tell him he’s breaking my heart every minute of every day. I won’t. It would just feel good.
