Thanks all for your advice. My dilemma is this... even if W was willing to re-consider MR:
A) The day after W left she said to me "You'll never be able to trust me ever again". I know enough about us to know that she really will think that, so she will think there's no point in her even trying. However, I would be willing to see what's possible.
B) W won't want to admit anything to me that could hurt me (and there could be more that I don't yet know about).
C) Her pride and ego will get in the way because she likes everyone to think how wonderful she is.
D) W really is incredibly stubborn and always has been. She doesn't say 'sorry' unless prompted.
E) W has used our problems to gain attention and sympathy.
F) W has used our problems as an excuse for failing exams and work issues.
G) W reacts badly to anything that could be seen as any kind as a personal criticism.
H) W lives with her parents who are very supportive of her (but they have both said they have noticed good changes in me).
I) W won't talk about anything MR related. I've not approached the subject for a couple of months or so.
W looked so unhappy at the court case, withdrew her claims against me because I was willing to show the court they were exaggerated, twisted taken out of context, and BS. W couldn't look at me, and we got a 50/50 deal for the kids. That 'might' be a bit of a wake-up call for her. If it is, W is unlikely to say to me because of the above reasons. I know W well enough that she needs a door left open. That's my logic behind saying that her father had suggested counselling.
