Husband cheated, left, trying DB 3

[Dtrmned]

Kech.
No. I would just let it play out as you had in the first scenario.
If he comes, he comes, if he doesn't, he doesn't. Don't get so wrapped up in his thoughts because even he doesn't know what he is thinking and doing therefore he has no idea what he is saying/texting. If you hang on his every word he will know. Trust me on this one. As a LBS I hung on every word, nuance, mood, whatever to get a "read" on my W. A lot of wasted time and energy. Your H wants to make sure you are still on the hook, the only way to show him you are not is to detach.

Work on you!