Merrick, Sorry it took so long for me to get back here but this has been a hectic 24 hours. The kids really keep me hopping. I think you are doing some thing good here Merrick, and I hope with all your Dbing she will see you for what you are after you leave. I am so sorry for your kids however, I know this will effect them alot. Your a great dad and they will need some time to adjust to this.
I think with where you are at this can only be a posituive to your sitch. As much as it hurts now be strong and try your best to keep your composure. The way you leave her will have a great effect on her. This is what you have been laying all the ground work for the last 10 months or however long you have been DBing. Just be her freind and give her the respect theat you understand her feelings, You dont have to agree, but you understand how she feels. One thing I foud that worked amazingly well for me last night as my W went into a tyraid on me was, I siply said I am done defending myself, you can think whatever you what because it does no good for me to tell you different, I know in my heart what my feelings are and I have tryed time after time to let you know and you refuse to believe me. Thats your choice, but I am donme defending myself. Everytime she tore ionto me looking for a reaction I simply said the same thing, Why are you doping this? I am not going to defend my self... Try it, it might help you to. It seemed to make her realize how blame orientated her convos are. Well thats my 2 cents. Hope your doing well my friend. I have a feeling in some regards your kind of relieved at your chance to make this desision finally. Gives you a chance to breath. I can relate to my feelings after my W becamre so crazy with the restaining order. What about the kids, Is there any chance you can do something like I am? It really is good for them. Gives them a chance to get used to the seperation of there family. It may be tougher on us parents, but the kids are most important right now. Hang tough buddy. KOFTGF, God Bless, eddy
