I asked her one more time to be open about it. That I promised her last year that I no longer care if she hangs out or talks to him, just be open about it. Let me know if she goes out to meet him, tell me. I asked her to give me a shot and try it out to see the response she gets from me.... time will tell, she seemed hesitant... she kept on saying that it doesn't matter because she doesn't see or talk to him anymore (lie) because I scared both of them. Of course I wanted to call her out on her lie, but I bit my tongue. Instead I said, "ok, in the case you choose to renew your friendship, I'm ok with it, just be open and forthcoming with me. She was hesitant, kept on saying they don't meet or talk anymore, and that it's hard for her to just take my word for it, because I've promised to be ok about it in the past, and yet kept on accusing her of doing different things with him behind my back.
Another thing Matrix you should stop engaging in her games. If she's lying, and you know she's lying, just say "look we both know that's not true but I don't want to talk about it" and shut it down. Go to another room and get busy. Go for a walk. Go clean the garage. When you say that and shut the door she may try persue you and continue denying it. Thats a guilt reaction. Either get away from her or change the subject. Tell her a funny story from your day. Bring up something about the kids. Engaging her in something you already know to he fact is sucking your emotional batteries dry. Trust me on that.
