Live in WAW VIII

[TripleJ]

Merrick,

If there ever is a guy who needs a huge hug from me (besides seattle!), it is you. I will tell you that you are more of a man than anyone I know, showing such commitment to a M that no other here has shown. I commend you for that. BUT..........

I am about to say something that you probably already know, but no one has said it to you.

You staying in that house is NOT working for you! In fact, it seems to me it is getting worse, and in this last post, it has escalated to a physical encounter, which you don't need.

I have been following your thread and it seems to me, IMHO, that your W is increasing her desire to everything and anything to get you away from her. It is now turned to physical abuse. What is next Merrick?

I REALLY feel for you because I know what the major thing on your mind is and its the kids. Thank God the kids have not seen this (I hope). And they don't need to see this kind of stuff. But it also appears to me that there is no stopping you W, and soon enough there may be a time where your kids do witness it.

I am afraid for you Merrick. Simply put.

But I can not tell you to leave the house. Its your decision and you know this. But I am just offering my opinion that your presence in that house is NOT saving your M. And I don't see how you getting smacked around helps you become a better person.

There is something that I don't understand and maybe you can help me out on this. What is stopping HER from leaving the house? You have had a few threads and may have touched on this, but I don't recall. Is it an alternative to have her decide to leave?

You have been a nice guy through all of this to her. Assuming some similarities between sitchs, I bet this is a 180 for you in some ways. Would it be so bad to stand up for yourself and say to her no more instead of taking the constant abuse, both physical and mental?

And I am not saying to start berating her and giving her a dose of her own medicine (which she deserves IMHO), but defend yourself and tell yourself "No MORE!"

This may be hard for you to do Merrick, but let me ask you and everyone else this:

Merrick, step out of your shoes and look at your sitch. What advice would you give yourself?

Now, all, imagine if this event happened to a woman, where a man was smacking around a woman, would the advice be different?

I am PRAYING for you Merrick!

Triple J