Hi why15, thanks for your reply. smile 3.5 years?? How are you holding up?? Since I've finally understood how to "let go and let God, some days I am a mess and others are better. That's ridiculous that they are opening up to OW like that when you both are not divorced or legally separated. My mother-in-law helped my H get some clothes and a bed into his apartment for our son when H first left the house. She helps him with food since he has chosen to spend our money unwisely. I know we're not supposed to discuss this stuff with family so I've never bothered.

I haven't gotten along with the MiL in the past but I've been working on me and opening more to people and growing (I've been told I have a change on my attitude from some others which made me happy.) But I called her to have our son say happy birthday to her and she was thrilled and ended up talking to me for over an hour. Shes very loud and chatty so she did most of the talking. She threw in some snarky hints regarding "how I treated the family" and "you cant just turn on and off good attitude." I chose to ignore the comments. I know she doesn't believe me on the better attitude but I'm not out to convince her of anything.

Anyway, I was just asking about the possible relatives noticing a difference, because a good friend of ours has certainly noticed how he's all over the place in conversations about anything close to me or the marriage, or else shuts down immediately, my mom had spoken to him way in the beginning of this and noticed he didn't seem himself. Yet apparently his own mom doesn't seem to notice. I've been told that MLCers can mask this stuff so I wasn't sure if maybe that was it. I dunno, I can't change anyone but myself, this was all just curiosity really. I don't plan on calling MiL any time soon again unless there are any emergencies.

Together for 13 years, married for 8.
H is 46
I'm 40
S is 6
Bombdrop in April 2018
Still in limbo as of 2019