Husband aged, trying 180 (4)

[Ready2Change]

...If I can handle my reactions to those conversations, then I can handle anything.

I have seen many variations to this:

H "I want a divorce"
W "I am sorry you feel that way. I see many options to solving our problems. but if D is THE ONLY way for you to be happy, I will not stand in your way"

or

W "I am sorry you feel that way. I see many options to solving our problems. but having relationships with other women before the D is finalized.....

There are lots of other things that can be said with this statement.


Draft up your response. We can help. The key is to Think about your response beforehand.

My goals right now are to get through our interactions pleasantly, not to nice him to death but to just try to be me, but brief, and slightly aloof.

Good goals. Strong confident women are attractive.

Ignoring him when he texts sometimes feels like the wrong thing to do.

You are in a difficult spot with daughter being so young. I believe it is important for you not to stand in the way of H relationship with D. Most WAS do that on their own.

If I want to come off as being okay, isn't ignoring him defeating that? I question this.

I don't know if ignoring things works. Projecting that you will be OK either way is good. Calling him on his disrespectful behavior is good.

I believe when he cross your boundaries, you enforce.

"H:When you come into the house to spend time with D and your attention is on your phone, I question your real motivation to be here. I am sure who ever it is, can wait until you are done spending time with D.

I ignored the picture he sent last night and today is the first day I haven't heard from him at all. Does ignoring him give off the vibe that I am upset?

Who knows. He want's to behave like a single man. Hopefully he continues to put being Dad ahead of other distractions.

You do not need to respond to ANYTHING immediately. Next time in person:

W "I like the picture you sent" (Short and sweet)