Ok so I am going to challenge some of the statements you made in your last post.
Your words say that you are not ok with an open relationship and you will not be a plan B. Well right now you are in an open Marriage and you are plan B. How can you change that?
You say your W says she is not in an A but you have viewed messages between them, admit that she is in love with him and have had open talks about them being together.
You moved out of the family home and pay her an allowance. She has the stability of a home, your money, a boyfriend and knows she can have you back at any moment. What is her incentive to change her setup anytime soon?
