Thanks for that. I need tough love myself I guess. I think I read and reread everything you guys write to me and I do take it all in, and I try to follow it all, but this is the only place for me to really vent so I just continue venting all these fears I have because I have no other outlet.
This is fair! I've heard this from other posters and still need to be reminded of that occasionally. Please, by all means, view this as a safe place to journal. But also be open to the feedback of when you are focusing on him too much. If you want him back focus on you and D.
Detachment is hard. But trust me, when you get there you will know it. The night my W cried that she knew D was wrong and she wanted to want to stay.....and I had no reaction. Not just outward but inwardly too. I was like "Ok." She got clingy and wanted my reassurance. She got nothing. It felt so good. I didn't get happy. I didn't get sad. I just was.
She took a couple of steps back after that (in fact that week was when I found a full dating profile on dating site with a picture and everything, but even with that I was more worried about my daughter finding out about it then being mad or sad about her doing it). But the point was detachment started to become easier as I worked at it. It sounds like you are on the right road towards true detachment.
M(53), W(54),D(19) M-23, T-25 Bomb Drop - Dec.23, 2017 Ring and Piecing since March 2018
