RE: Returning- After some bad stuff- need advice

[mbe76]

Every time I read your posts for some reason I get extremely angry. She is not in a fog she is playing you to get what she wants. She has no respect for you because you have no respect for yourself. A woman can not be in love with a man she has no respect for.


Stop confusing affection with confusion when it is clearly manipulation.

I was planning on going home at the weekend and staying. All the other stuff she can deal with.

In your signature you say your W is in love with another man but yet you still are intimate with her. This blows my mind.

The only reason we were intimate is because I stupidly fell for it- I resisted at first when she went to hug me- but we were getting on so well and it felt right- what a fool I am eh?

That you ask how to get your W stop criticizing you in front of the kids. WTF? You don't tolerate that bs. No one will ever say or do to you what you don't allow them to.

So this is a boundary- and instead of getting into an argument, I tell her firmly "I will not be disrespected like this in front of our children" I then walk to another room. It does seem to take the steam out of her spleen.

You have a lot of work to do my friend! The good news is if you do it and are patient I think you will get another chance with your W. I am willing to bet OM does want nothing to do with 3 young kids and it would be extremely hard for your W to make it in her own.

On previous posts- I have mentioned how I have seen the messages between the two of them and how they want to be together and how he loves kids etc. but in the past I have (stupidly) said things like "he needs to step up, if you want him, let's see if he does" etc. I know this is pathetic but in essence it is true- she needs to decide what she wants and let me know- if she does want the D then I want to move on- but obvs I need a place to live and that I can afford as I cannot stay at my parents house for much longer in any case.

The thing is if you did the work and started to realize that you are a catch and start to gain some confidence you won't accept being her plan b.

I have told her before I don't want to be her "plan B" but do you think that the plan to move back home is wise move right now- as I am concerned that given that she has previously made FAs against me, she will just call the Police and have me removed in any case- although to be fair at least then I know where she is at and that the D would seem inevitable. What do you think?