Steve, my therapist is not a help regarding this bizarro husband behavior. She pushes for divorce hard and keeps saying he is probably hiding something naughty or disturbing that he feels is shameful. I don't want to give up on my marriage, but she says its been four months and he's made up his mind and to let go of him. He's not himself to me, this is not my husband and I refuse to give up after four months.

He's done temp checking before regarding when he starts to come closer, he steps back and tells me about some form of D paperwork yet never follows through with it. He did that a few days ago as well after two weeks of being more open with me. This is the second or third time he's done this regarding saying he is working on paperwork and then never follows through.

He's more open and chatty on the phone like his old voice is more clear now rather than this fog voice (if that makes sense), yet in person at our sons drop off and pick up he is more reserved than he is on the phone. I just don't understand his behavior shifts so I don't engage it if I can help it. Why be able to be chattier on the phone yet in person act reserved and shy?

So basically when he acts clearer and less foggy on the phone keep on being casual and don't engage the conversation? Its like a huge terrible game of tag or tug of war. So just keep on working on me as he goes through whatever his issues are? He apparently doesn't even talk to his very best friend about this. His friend called to see how I was doing and we chatted for a bit and H doesn't talk about this with him and if they do talk a little bit he changes the subject on it. It just doesn't make sense.

I definitely know talking to him like hes a friend is not working right now, lol! That gets him running. Anything where I am friendly to him gets him running. If I'm a mystery, he opens up more.

Together for 13 years, married for 8.
H is 46
I'm 40
S is 6
Bombdrop in April 2018
Still in limbo as of 2019