I asume that her mirtazapine dosage is quite small? If used in bigger dosages(over 15mg) it can actually have an opposite reaction if used as a sleeping aid. Sertaline doesn't react quite good with alcohol either. Kind of funny that she has two antidepressants...
I read all of your posts and something just seems off. Like this is not your basic WAW/WW...but keep DBing. That is to keep you and your kids safe.
At one point you had a thought that your W might have NPD. To me it sounds more like a triggered trauma. But that really doesn't matter. You can not help her at the moment. Like everyone has said. Keep on the DB. You got this. You're on a good path already.
Me:39 W:36 S:12 D:9 T:14 M:11 Separation:sep. 1 2017 D filed oct. 2017 D finalized july 2018 OM confirmed feb 2018 D finalized July 2018
The fact is this. You have to be in pain before you can learn.