In many ways we are still in the dark ages when it comes to mental illness understanding and treatment. Hopefully with time we'll have a better understanding of the impact of SSRI's and other medications, but right now there simply isn't enough data.
Please understand that the answer to your situation is not to simply get your spouse to quit taking SSRI's. More often than not their body chemistry has adjusted to the SSRI's and to suddenly quit taking them after years can result in catastrophic consequences. A friend of mine became convinced the SSRI's he was on were responsible for his weight gain and other health issues so he quit taking them. He immediately spiraled into deep depression and became suicidal. He started taking them again but his body DID NOT RESPOND to them the 2nd time!! He ended up in a mental hospital for 6 months undergoing radical treatment including electroshock therapy. It took another year to find the right combination of drugs to get him back to a semblance of normality.
In short, SSRI's may very well be responsible for many of our situations. But getting our spouse off of them will not magically fix things either.
