WAW pt2

[jaylove]

Journaling

Wife was visited by a family support worker at the start of the week and has been furious with me since. Not surprising really but she has to face the consequences of her actions of the last few years, as my therapist has said - the answer never lies at the bottom of the bottle.
Whatever words my W has said, her actions have been clear - she’s filed the divorce petition, moved out of the family home and only talks to me about matters relating to our children, so while I have been GAL - meeting old friends, working out, spending quality time with the kids, every day I realise that W is going full steam ahead with the divorce.

In the last few days I’ve started to realise that I’m enjoying not having W around, no more treading on egg shells, I can do what I like when I like when she has the kids, yet there’s still a huge hole in my life - I do feel lonely but I really hope I can spend a long period of time without getting into another R and can learn to be happy on my own.
Looking back it’s obvious I started the R with my current wife too early after the death of my first wife - (18 months )
In the past few days a number of friends have asked if my W is having an affair - that would provide an answer to why she’s done what she has done - if it were true then I’m sure it would make me feel even worse than I do already.

I read many of the other threads here and can’t help but wish my W was still living in the same home- at least she might notice the changes I’m making in my life- she inherited a lot of money last September which has given her more choices and the fluidity to pay for a nice house to rent - plus she seems to be spending it and frivolous things so as to avoid it being put into the matrimonial pot when the D gets finalised. Crazy when she says she wants what’s best for the kids - we’re going to need two houses from the one house we have currently.