Finding my way into the light

[Holding]

Focus, financial security is a process for me, with stages. I keep refining things, but here's what I have so far:

Stage 1 - Pay off credit cards and car (complete)
Stage 2 - Refinance house (in process) and establish new budget
Stage 3 - Push for raise or new job
Stage 4 - Build up savings account
Stage 5 - Start paying off student loans aggressively, until paid off early
Stage 6 - Start paying off mortgage aggressively, until paid off early
Stage 7 - Fill a pool with gold coins and dive in?

My M was an 18-year ponzi scheme, where we lived paycheck to paycheck, constantly ran up credit card debt, and borrowed money from relatives. We even started out from a horrible position, by putting the cost of the wedding reception on a credit card. I'll never forget the time I had to buy a few gallons of gas with a bag of pennies. We also borrowed money from our kids to pay bills. (Yes, you read that right.) It was shameful and I refuse to ever live that way again. That behavior was all my XW, and I'll admit I did nothing to try to reign her in because I was a wuss. (Wow, writing that out has given me a lot of clarity.)

Focus, that's great that you paid off your mortgage! Congrats! Are there negative tax implications for you now that it's paid off? In the US we get a tax can write-off when we have a mortgage.