I hear what you're saying, Amoafwl,about GAL. I meant more during the week than on the weekends as far as not having time. This weekend, I actually did GAL Saturday, and was also doing things around here yesterday apart from watching movies (laundry, cleaning, etc.). The main thing was hanging out with my S, who was picking the movies. In fact, we had just started the first one when W got home, so it was more of a "her joining us" thing than anything else... we were going to do it regardless. When S started the third movie, about 45 minutes in, he got bored and wanted to hang with a friend across the street. She asked me if I wanted to finish the movie in the Master Bedroom, not the other way around.
Also, I wasn't rewarding her for what happened Thursday. I told her pretty plainly that she could leave Saturday morning, something I've not ever done in the past, and is out of character for me. Her response to that the rest of the day and yesterday is why I was willing to hang out as "buddies".
The day was good only because there was no tension and anxiety on my end... I was in a good place mentally and emotionally. That's what I meant.
As far as GAL and being independent, it's something I know I have to do and stick with, regardless of what happens with my sitch. One thing she's expressed in all of this is that she wants me to have that so she doesn't feel responsible for my identity. And, further, she's right... she shouldn't, nor should I be for hers. Interdependence, not co-dependence is what's healthy in a relationship. But, even if she walks away, I still have to have that for my own health.
