I'm just lurking (my sitch is over in the "Newcomer's Forum",) but I wanted to add a couple of things.
I think you can be LD or HD depending on your partner/circumstances.
There have been times I have been either LD or HD. If my partner is easy-going, patient (it takes me a long time to climax, and I am very sensitive to my partner getting tired/annoyed/etc. Also, it seems that some men are used to the "porn" orgasm--instant, no real communication necessary, etc)
I had a significant relationship in my early 20's that was very HD--very creative boyfriend, patient, paid attention to what turned me on, etc.
Next significant R was quite LD for us both--I had been hurt by the first R, and he had a bad back. It didn't really matter that we didn't ML all that much, and the R ended for other reasons.
Then came my H, who started out HD and was very creative in bed, but lacked patience. Then he had some physical problems that made him self-conscious. Our sex life was never what I wanted it to be (1 or 2x a month) from pretty much the time we married, but because he lacked patience, I didn't really fret about it--I love this man and that made up for it. It wasn't a big deal to me really.
Right before our marital problems caused him to drop the IDLY bomb, we went to one of those "sex stores" together, and got some toys, and things have never been the same! Since it takes me quite a while to climax, I use the new vibrator, and he doesn't get tired. We have watched some decent movies, where there is actually someone willing to communicate with their partner, and it has obviously affected him. We have both started exploring sides of ourselves that we never have. I kind of knew that he COULD be HD, and I felt like I COULD be HD with the right person, and now, he IS the right person, if that makes sense!
Even through our troubles, our sex life has done nothing but get better, and more frequent. But, reason I'm here, he may not be in my life much longer.
If we went back to being LD, it wouldn't make me not want my husband back. Shoot--if we NEVER had sex, I would still want him...and if we patch this up and have it 2x a day, yippee!!
