Thanks guys for the encouraging words, I read them frequently to give me strength...
Nicole: The day itself was like a continuous FOG...I reverted back ruminating about all of the unanswered questions and thoughts from the Bomb Drop and how this could have possibly happened..The good thing, was this time I was able to stop the stories and understand that she isn't capable of honestly answering them nor does it do me any good now to have them answered at this point with the Divorce FINAL..
What probably made it most difficult was that it was also my first day back to work from summer vacation and having to deal with all of the questions from colleagues...I seemed like a fighter just taking blow after blow..."How is your sweet beautiful wife?", "How is your new house coming along?", "What amazing adventures did you guys do this summer?"...Those were the continuous body shots and the knockout blow was "Well, any baby news? You gonna be a daddy yet?" Yep, got that 3 times and each time it cut deeper and deeper.. The SAD thing on my end was I didn't know how to say that our Divorce was going to be final at the end of the day:-( I think that I knew the news would bring shock and attention or maybe I was just embarrassed or too hurt..Whatever reason, I just would laugh off the questions and give vague answers...At the end of the day, I just threw my hands up in the air and told the universe that I had had enough pain and was ready for something positive..When I went to bed, I felt a sense of pride from surviving the day and felt that I was continually getting stronger and more resilient...
The last couple of days have been mostly up but some down, the difference is that now I don't allow myself to follow the stories when I'm down and make it worse...I feel good that I'm making progress day by day, moment by moment and once again revisit the posts on here for inspiration when I'm low...Thx again!!
