I was kind of shocked. So I asked what she meant by that. She said she might be interested in working on getting back together.
Let's move back in together because I -might- be interested in working on things. Ummmm, NO.
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I told her that I would think about it, but I would expect her to be honest and not talk to certain people.
EXCELLENT RESPONSE!
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She flipped out and said I was just being controlling, abusive, and manipulative.
Whiny brat-like reaction.
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I stood my ground.
WELL DONE!
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Then she started telling me "this isn't how you get people to love you"
This is CLEAR manipulation to try and get you to do what she wants. Yet she accuses you of manipulation!?!?
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Then she said she has no interest in being with me at all, and she made a mistake asking me that.
So in other words this was all a ploy to make things more convenient for her, there was never any interest in reconciling. She needs to WORK to get you back and until she's willing to do that work there's really nothing to talk about.
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Today she called again. But she was a lot calmer. She wanted to let me know the days I needed to pick S up from school. I added the days to my calendar.
OK I don't know all the details of your sitch and maybe you can clarify, but it sounds to me like you're bailing her out of her problems. Sorry for not knowing more details of your sitch but do you have 50-50 custody? If so, you really shouldn't relieve her of her responsibilities on the weeks she has the kids. You need to be engaged in your own life and even if you don't need it right now, you're going to want those weeks to yourself later. ESPECIALLY after the above convo I would NOT have just caved and given her what she wanted. SHE wanted to S, SHE needs to assume her half of the responsibilities for that. She needs to make whatever arrangements she needs to and not just expect you to be her part-time husband, nanny and caregiver when it suits her.
