Gordie 21 going with my gut

[Rita]

Oh yes, DB fatigue. I've got it bad. It's just funny because you are at a place so many of us long to be in but you seem more fatigued than when you were more in hell! But I guess that's how it works.

Here's something about speaking life and not death over your M from a blog called Grace, Love, Life.

It's like if half a couple says: "We are not married, we are separated." But the other spouse says: "But we ARE STILL married." Different language is used, offering a different perspective or 'truth'. Instead of continuously repeating: 'We are separated.' I say; 'We are on the path of restoration.' OR 'I am still married!'

Here is an example {pretend} scenario:My husband comes to get the kids for his time. I smile, and am friendly. He gives a slight smile and happens to tell me he got paid and made a deposit into our joint bank account. They leave quickly.

I CAN FOCUS ON the fact that he did not invite me along.

I can go to my sad place and cry out to God in despair that my husband is still not home...when will he be home? Maybe never. Probably NEVER! Our kids need more than a part-time, dead-beat dad!
He smiled so arrogantly just cause he works and got some $$$! He's probably going to take them out to eat--must be nice not ever having to cook a real meal and clean it up! He'll probably give an excessive tip just to show off.
Look how he just rushed out cause he can't even stand me.
I can't wait anymore, he is NEVER coming home! I'm filing for divorce myself 1st thing tomorrow!!!!
He is such a ________!
How could I have EVER married him.
What a mistake!
WHY is this happening TO me!?!
God you are not even helping me! I guess I heard You wrong and You are not going to ever restore my marriage!?
OR I CAN FOCUS ON THIS:

I was friendly, pleasant and smiled at my husband.
I noticed he smiled back and I was reminded of how much I love his smile.
His body language was relaxed and open, his face was light when he told me about his paycheck.
Praise the Lord, my husband was open and honest about his income.
Praise the Lord he still desires to provide for us and wanted me to know that. Six months ago he had no income.
Thank You Lord for providing through my husband. I am so glad he is involved in our children's lives. Our children really need their father and he is important to them. Their relationship is very important.
Thank You God for turning the father's heart toward his children and our children's heart toward their father.
Thank You God that this exchange went peacefully and stress free.
Thank You God for moving in my husband's heart. I know You are working.
Thank You that he is prompt and respects other people's time.
Thank you that he values every minute with our children and will probably treat them to dinner and feed them well. They will enjoy that. I know he likes to leave big tips and bless the wait-staff.
Thank you for his generous spirit. Lord, bless MY husband.
Lord, I want to thank You in advance for the restoration of my marriage.
You are a good God.
The first scenario is focused on DEATH and speaks it. The second scenario is focused on LIFE and speaks it. It's NOT living in denial. It's not 'not' facing reality. It's following God's word and focusing on what is good and positive. It is blessing and not cursing. THAT is speaking LIFE.