Maika, how are you my man? Long time no exchange. I have been following you (and Joseph) from time to time to see if anything new arises. I always thought you and him (and perhaps Gordie over at MLC) might one day find yourself with a WAS that wanted to R. You're still doing it textbook as far as I can tell.
I wanted some advice. No change in my sitch, still separated after over 2 years but for the first time, starting about 2 months ago, I changed my approach and just started being nicer (in part because our litigation ended, which lasted probably 1.5 of those first two years). No real expectations and probably almost fully detached at this stage (although still physically attracted to her), but she is now starting to open up bit, communicating more, mainly by text, and we have even hung out a few times with the kids on weekends. Nothing huge, she is being cautious it seems, 2 steps forward, 1 step back kind of thing. But not all business either.
My question is whether I accept an invite to her place for S4's birthday party? We have to this point done separate birthday parties for the kids. Other factor to consider is that most of her family will be there and I haven't kept in touch with them since we separated (we were never married, just common law). Like you there was no affair or anything that drove us apart, just the usual complaints about inattentiveness.
Anyway, not sure if cake-eating even applies after 2+ years but wanted ur take on things. Does it count as pursuing if she extends the invite? Probably not, but it wouldn't likely have been offered had I not changed course which could be viewed as pursuing, and I'm aware that the vets on here would say you can't nice them back, or maybe that really only applies to WW, not WAS. Not sure. I'm not hooked up with anyone new, but have dated (she's probably aware of that) and I heard she was seeing someone but it didn't work, out and not sure if she is currently dating someone.
I think she knows I would probably give it another try, especially for the kids, who are still very young, and for financial reasons as well, so don't want to seem too eager by accepting her first invite since things have improved, it may confirm any thoughts she may have that I am always available to R if she was to suggest some form of piecing.
Or maybe it's just an invite to D4's bday party and nothing more (overthinking it), but with her family (and good friend) there, she would be left having to explain my sudden appearance. I have worked on improving myself over the past year or so but hard to know what, if anything, that means in this new dynamic.
