That is a great perspective Ballast. Living in uncertainty is difficult, but ultimately, I hope, more rewarding than a false sense of control.
Also, while all of those things that you have learned can't guarantee that any future relationship will work, but they certainly can raise the odds. For example, my W may have walked away no matter what, but my emotional neediness certainly didn't help matters and probably contributed to the demise of the MR.
It's good to hear you talking this way. It gives me hope both for you and myself.
W 34 Me 42 Married 7 years together 8 0 kids 1 beloved dog BD 4/6/2018 I moved out 4/7/2018 I moved back in alone 8/05/2018 I file 3/06/2019 D official 5/7/2019