I'm Broken II

[HelenaJ]

Hi Nicole. I certainly hope that detaching will help me see things from a new perspective. I'm doing fairly well with it, most of what he does or says doesn't concern me. The one thing that continues to be very difficult for me is actually having to be the one to initiate a separation. I'm very concerned that my kids will see that and think that I am the one who doesn't want our life. And the way that H has framed it all is so very difficult. If I choose anything other than to stay, I am putting my own happiness above my children's, which is of course not something a Mom would typically choose to do. I am really struggling with this, I don't know how I would be able to deal with their emotions if they were negative toward me. My kids are my reason for everything, especially now that there is no M left. So can anyone tell me how I can possibly shatter their lives? This will always be the hardest part for me and from where I sit now, I can't see what my future looks like because I don't know that I will ever be able to tell them that I am leaving their father.