Mrs JLS journey to saving the marriage

[Vanilla]

Apologies for being MIA, have been dealing with a personal issue, which is on my own thread in surviving.

Goals

OK goals are about your own actions, things you do.

Outcomes are the result of the goals and it's how you measure the goals are effective.

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Goals are:

Action orientated
In the present tense
Personal
Measurable
Capable of changing that is you do that which works.
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So a great goal might be:

I have activities that I enjoy and I go GAL three times a week..........
The goal is enjoyable GAL the measure is 3 times a week, the outcome is (dancing 3 times)

I am happily exercising, and I go to the gym 5 times a week go running etc
The goal is exercise the measure is 5 times a week the outcome is being able to run 3 miles

Now

I am looking fabulous, I dress to the shoes every day, I wear perfume etc and H mentions how lovely I look and I feel amazing

The goal is looking fabulous the measure is every day the outcome is H says how lovely I look and to feel amazing

The goal isn't H says how lovely I look, you have no control over H or what he says

You are detached from H saying you look lovely, it's an outcome, great if he does and great if he doesn't because you feel amazing anyway.

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I trust that explains.

V