thanks Neffer, Steve and J9 for the comments. I guess our being physically apart for months has made detach easier and since W has basically ghosted me for what is now weeks, I don't need to deal with immediate day to day much. i wish I had the ability to interact more with W especially in regards to D, but I have been able to basically live a post-D life and see that I'll be ok if it comes to that.
hope...as time and actions have passed I've begun to re-evaluate exactly what that word means to me. with enough time past such that you can recover yourself emotionally and start to rationally think about everything, the word takes on many different meanings/possibilities that you didn't previously realize existed. what is fact is that I truly loved the woman I married and wanted that til death do us part. as she is now on a different path by her choice, so too am I as a result of her choice. now though I have the power to define my own new path with new choices as well. just have to not be rash about it and be patient.
