I feel like I am on the same path as you except we have a kid... you have no children? So missing my daughter half the time her whole childhood is a big difference. Im so fed up of the games and the oh I want to hang out and have a drink... lets go to dinner its been a long time. Then I say ok, lets do it this night and then she goes OMG it feels like so much pressure.
For me Im going to decline hanging out. Im not doing D3 birthday plans together. Im not inviting W to anything unless she chooses to work on the marriage.
I read most of your sitch... Such a long time! I wish you the best in your future. Im sure you will find true happiness and another woman who you can grow together with. Unbelievable how much we learn from this isnt it... It can be a shame and a curse or a blessing.... well see how it plays out wont we. Such is life.
All the best!
H: 33 W:32 M: 5 T: 8 D: 4 BD: 6/2017 MO: 6/2017 House sold: 6/28/18 W wants to build friendship / relationship- 9/18 Paying $ support since 7/18. Physical Reconnect- 10/18 W Starts- IC / MC - 10/18