Thanks guys for chiming in. I gotta figure out what's going in this crazy lil mind of mine. It goes in all different directions sometimes and thinks crazy things. I definitely like my own time, being able to do what I want when I want etc. But I also liked being in a relationship for different reasons... I just enjoyed it. And now I am so far removed from that.... it's a little scary to be honest.
Anyway, a few weeks ago I went to London and Ireland for a friends wedding.... by myself and it was.... awesome! I explored all day/night and did what ever I want, saw what I wanted to see... there was no one else's desires to keep in mind. But my mind went back and forth between thinking this is great to gosh... it would be nice to have shared this with someone. On a tour I went on there was a newlywed couple sitting right in front of me and it definitely brought out some interesting, weird and confusing thoughts. So I have to figure this out otherwise I'll be like Liz Lemon from 30 Rock when she was worrying about dying alone in her apartment all the time ;-).
I deleted all online apps because if I am not going to do anything with them then whats the point. I also found they were taking way too much of my time. I need to break the phone habit ugh! Terrible! I have a hit on a few women IRL (in real life as the kids say). It was well received I am just a terrible judge of age apparently. Maybe just keep going that way.
I also have limited time. I have a 2 hr one way commute and live in the sticks. I can't move for a little bit. So it's tough in that regard as well. hmph!!
The more I have been thinking about it the more and more I think my lack of dating is defensive in nature...don't do it and you can't get bit type of deal. Hmph I don't know. The expense of it does not concern me. Actually,it would be nice to spend money on someone again. I think my ideal type of first date would actual be maybe a short walk or easy hike. Then we can go from there and the second one can be more elaborate. I don't think many early 30s women would be woo'd by that or a coffee date though haha! But if they were... (love eyes).
