To me you sound a little depressed especially the part about parenting
Not depressed in a clinical sense but lacking in motivation and energy and engagement
I know that feeling and think you and Mach1 previously advised when I felt that way
It was okay and understandable because you have been living under a prolonged period of stress
And that during these times maybe you just need a break from the situation
Maybe a solo vacaton or just a change of scenery and quiet for a day can do wonders to clear the mind
Or maybe a longer a week or a month where you say I am not going to DB or try to be a certain way
I am just going to be and let yourself recharge and reset before making any big decisions
Gordie 40s W 40s M20+ kids 2016 BD W fantasy affair w OM1 I do everything wrong 2017 I start to DB W says TLTL files for D PA w OM2 2018 I do LRT W drops filing and OM2 situation slowly improving