Detaching / Dbing... Can I get to Piecing?

[Did]

Such a fine line with her. When I am nice and spend time around her but focus on D3 (she is obsessed with D3 almost to an unhealthy level) she likes it, has mentioned wanting to touch or hug more months ago when I was hanging at her parents to see D3 when I worked every night in the spring. When I go LRT and little to no contact I dont see much improvement or negative - just flat line more of the same. When I pursue that definitely gives her anxiety and makes her pull away.

She is so sensitive and calls herself an empath - she picks up feelings from people around her. So when I am tense or try to hold back and not be myself she immediately feels it. Trying to DB (which is the opposite of my tendencies to be nice and loving to the woman I love... trying my best) is hard in person. I feel like I should just be myself in person but focus on D3 and little to no focus on W. Not be short or anything just calm, cool, confident, happy.

Pretty sure there is no OM in the picture at least she never mentions him and for some reason she tells me who shes going out with when she makes plans. Obviously could be lying or hiding it but she used to bring up OM when he was in the picture. I guess I shouldnt really be dating since I want to be with my wife but its been almost a year and a half with no end in site... getting lonely and a man has needs ya know!

I went to the gym tonight then to a nature reserve near my house, facetimed with daughter to say goodnight and ended up talking to D3 for a while. She does really well at W's house... she is a great mom just a little over the top. I had mentioned to W a few days ago that I really want D3 every day but not alone... I guess thats definitely pursuit. W talked about starting her business, expenses, trying to be tight with money etc. A few weeks ago she bought some things for each of us and had said maybe I owe her a drink or dinner and I was all for that... now she is talking about me just paying her back. I didnt let my disappointment show... Wishing / hoping for more but still not seeing real progress. Ill keep fighting.