Helena, things aren't always obvious. Your feeling of hopelessness reminded of this, it may be dumb and it may just make you laugh, but I'm posting it here b/c it did something for me when I was/am feeling similar...
Ended up on a crossroad Try to figure out which way to go It's like you're stuck on a treadmill Running in the same place You got your hazard lights on now Hoping that somebody would slow down Praying for a miracle Who'll show you grace? Had a couple dollars and a quarter tank of gas With a long journey ahead Seen a truck pull over God sent an angel to help you out He gave you direction Showed you how to read a map With a long journey ahead Said it ain't over Oh, even in the midst of doubt
H 34 W 29 BD 3/12/18 Divorce Busted Spring 19
It is not things that bother us, but the stories we tell ourselves about things.