New Year, new thinking..

[Coly23]

Job, West, AP! Great to hear from you all, thanks so mch for the visit.

Just to journal a bit then: I'm not going to lie but I have struggled these past few months. I feel very emotional most of the time. I feel like I am on autopilot, just going through the motions because I know if I stop I will spiral into a very dark place.

There are only a couple of people in RL and off course you lovely people who understand. I think most people look at me all smiles and lightness and think I'm over it but deep down my heart is still in pieces and retrieving these pieces is proving to be very difficult.

It's just so hard knowing that he is not interested one bit in even my wellfare. We are still married but in his life I don't exist or matter anymore. That's a bitter pill to swallow. I know it's up to me to make myself better but I think it's the feelings of failure and rejection that keep me stuck and I'm not sure how to move forward from that.

Thanks for listening... Xx