Thank you so much for your kind words and encouragement. I am reading other posts and I am very well aware that I have to be very very patient and navigate through these changes very carefully and very slowly without any backsliding from my side. This forum has given me so much already- I don't feel alone in this and reading other experiences helps me enormously. I realise that I have to work out my own issues (insecurity, need to feel loved, GAL) first before asking something from my H.
Nothing much happened yesterday, I think he only touched my shoulder once but he appeared to be a bit more cheerful than before and he said a few jokes and generally was in a good mood. When he went out shopping yesterday he asked me if I would like anything and I jokingly said- "a chocolate please". H is on 5-2 diet and yesterday was his dieting day. H smiled and said- "that's not fair, I am on a diet!" Nevertheless, he came back with a big bar of chocolate, gave to me and said- "I can be nice to my girl sometimes"... I know I shouldn't assume anything but I thought that he enjoyed doing something nice to me.
Tomorrow we are travelling to stay with his friends' at their house in the middle of nowhere- it was planned some time ago- nothing romantic as we will sleep on the bunk beds but again I have a great opportunity to show myself from my very best. I really have been doing that since our last horrible evening 2 weeks ago and I notice changes... no pursuing seems to work as well and he hasn't mentioned D word for about a week now. I just need to remind myself to keep going- smile, be cheerful, confident and fun regardless of what I feel inside... and it remainds me that I was like this when we first met- very confident and hopeful for the future.
W34 H61 M1 T3 June-H said he wants divorce but hasn't filed. Living and sleeping in the same bed, no intimacy from H side for last 12 months.
