Advice on my scenario pt. 20-Shock Therapy

[OrangeK]

I am in control, although it is still seeming difficult to maintain said control.
I can still feel the wheel of the "Cycle" or recovery rolling, but i feel it less keenly each time around.


Mind reading most likely, but i feel like the "Loss or series of losses" is mounting for her, here are the reasons I think this to be the case.

1.) The Exposure of Affair - The affair was an impulse decision, and as it was exciting, new and fun, she maintained it. I dont believe She ever wanted me to find out about the affair, She hid it for months, fervently, and denied it for months, despite mounting evidence. She lied about the scope of the affair and lead me on for months until i surrendered the apartment.
I believe her intention was originally to keep the affair secret (although she messed up in doing this) and stay in the marital home.

2.) The Apartment - As mentioned above, she was very careful to instill false hope during Oct-Dec before i surrendered the apartment. Once she knew the MH was going away, and her stuff would have to move, she wouldnt have a landing pad, and that I was standing up for myself, her demeanor changed dramatically. She want from wishy washy with Hope and Hurt, to 100% cold discard. She Never expected me to leave our home or move on by myself.

3.) Caught Red Handed - When I caught her at OM's house in Jan after she had told me several times they were just friends, it was a ONS, they werent seeing eachother.

4.)Divorce - Despite yelling "I WANT A DIVORCE" in MC meeting in Jan, she never filed, and had AMPLE time to do so.
I dont think she ever expected me to go through with it, and it caused serious personal narcissistic injury when I did. Causing her to "Hate" me more.

5.) Her Car - Her car died and she is now RELIANT on OM for a vehicle, he is also the only place they hang out with. She seems to have already alienated his friends.

6.) Custody - She wanted the custody schedule to stay the same as we had set it up back in Oct. She wasnt pleased when the Court issued a new one that was mandatory. It conflicted with her schedule.

7.) Child Support / Daycare - This is a big one. She has thought this whole time the divorce would go her way at every turn. Since the notice that I am not responsible for Daycare, she has very much shut down. Isnt reaching out antagonistically or with false concern like she was a few weeks back. She was VERY cold and rude to SIL yesterday.

8.) Nobody Cares - Most of what she does is motivated by attention seeking. The Drama and hubbub of the affair/divorce and new R with OM has lost its social impact. Life is returning to normal, just work and Childcare, day to day stuff. But now she doesnt have a home, a car, independence, or nearly as much free time or available spending money. The cascade of BS is starting to pile up around her legs.
Moreover, She has had to explain and deal with the social fallout of explaining what happened, lying about it, and dealing with people who know the truth of what happened.

Sandi - Does this sound like the type of "Losses" you refer to ?

Bump for opinions???