My WAS - looking help and thanks in advance PART 3

[ovrrnbw]

Well we went to the lake, had a good day Friday until she got drunk and blacked out. Dropped f bombs at the restaurant, wanted to wait outside, then wanted to jump out of the moving car. I called her parents to try to talk sense into her so maybe she wouldn't go to jail.

Of course her parents blame me for letting her get drunk. I should have used their line: "I can't control her". I perused her phone while she was passed out and found out she, surprise, didn't go to Chicago the weekend before and hadn't broke it off with the OM. Two big lies. I slept in the other bedroom. So the next day I'm ready to pack up and she's all "I love you, let's stay, blah blah blah". So I stayed.

Day is going OK but she brings up the affair, saying it's not an affair. If you bring up the basic facts, she goes to how my mom had an affair or how I didn't treat her right. So again I slept in the other bedroom.

Sunday she wants me to come inside to talk, I say no, you're seeing someone else we have nothing to talk about. I tell her I'm going to mass and she can go into town if she wants while I'm at mass. After mass she wants to hang out, I stayed strong and said "No, we can't hang out while OM is around". She says she can't tell him bc she has a cooler and some belongings there. I tell her that means very little to me and that I can't hang out with her. Finally she texts him to end it, but it's snapchat and doesn't save the message. I tell her I don't believe her several times, so she let's me read the response which basically confirms it. But OM's name is saved as "Brittany", her friend's name, instead of the guy's name. So I'm like wait WTF? Who did you text? Then she says I am being mean to her by sticking firm to my boundary.

She's mad at my mom bc my mom accidentally sent a text to the group chat (sister, mom, me) instead of just my sister. My mom said she wonders what is going on with me and how much more I can take and the obvious isn't clicking. I tell this to WW to make her feel better, saying my mom says isn't happy with me either. WW takes offense, of course.

She's mad at me bc I was pissed and let her sleep in the car Friday night until 12:30 (I stayed up, didn't go to bed with her out there) and that I didn't want to talk to her or sleep in bed with her Friday night.

Rest of Sunday went fairly well. Great. Monday: she asks me this morning to do something tonight, I agree. She calls at work to ask what I've told my mom/sister today about our situation. I'm at work so it's hard to talk. Then she says she's going to talk to her mom after work bc she has "mixed feelings" and that I was being controlling and mean to her over the weekend.

WW told me in so many words and through several convos that she is not in control of herself, feels like a tornado inside her, is so up and down, very upset. I didn't tell her she's depressed but that she can get help and do something about it.

Once again I have this splitting headache from dealing with all of this, just like on Saturday.

What's the strategy from here?