Advice on my scenario pt. 20-Shock Therapy

[SteveLW]

It takes time. Yes we all hate hearing that. Especially since when time is a nebulous thing. 1 second is time. 1 millennium is time. So which is it?

It is different for everyone. 1 person might be fully moved on in 3 months, another is still struggling with things after 3 years! You can't know, and it take the time it takes. It like a broken leg. Everyone wants to be healed and back on their feet quickly. But there are different degrees of broken legs. There is fractured, clean breaks, shattered legs. No two are the same. My fracture might take 6-8 weeks. Your shattered leg might take 12-18 months. The problem is that it will be fully healed when it is and not a moment before.

But as I told you last week, the key for me, and hopefully for you, is to be BUSY. All the time. Keep your mind occupied. The more you sit and stew the worse you will feel. This was me. As long as I was busy I could cope. When I was bored I constantly stewed on the sitch.

I've also seen a pattern. Anytime you have a close-encounter, you spin. You said you saw them leaving with your S from SiL's house. And then today you are struggling. This is why I've said that the TRO might be, in your sitch, a blessing in disguise.

But in general, just stay strong OK! You've got this. The way you've handled her in texts recently has been textbook perfect. And while it feels counter-intuitive, that is, what the vets around her refer to as, the illusion of action. Doing NOTHING feels wrong, especially to fix-it type LBHs. But doing something is counter-productive so you have to fight that urge.