What about her wanting to spend tome together and hang out? When we exchange D3 we normally spend some time at each other’s places. Cut that out? If she asks to do an activity like get a drink or dinner accept? And just let her plan it?
No, don't do any of that stuff. She wanted a separation, so give it to her. Stop playing like your her gay boyfriend. When you go to get D3, don't waste a second getting out of there. When she comes to pick up D3, be dressed as if you are going out. Have all of D3's things ready to go, and don't invite your W to stay, don't offer her anything to drink, or whatever. If you have to......tell her you have plans and are pushing the clock. Trust me, if she thought you were going out.....and maybe some other woman was interested in you, she'd be pursuing you like a crazy person. But, she knows she has nothing to be concerned about, b/c you are acting like her gay boyfriend instead of man who has basically been set free and is on the market again.
If you will start behaving as if you are no longer interested in her, I promise you will see a big difference. As long as you are available to "hang out" when she has nothing better to do......she will see you as a loser. On the other hand, if she thought for one second that she might be replaced in your life...….she'd be all over you. How do I know? B/c we are talking about a little thing called human nature. It doesn't change. So, start behaving as if you have dumped her, and have moved on.
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On books I thought it pertained to Dr and DB not nmmng which Moreno of a self help than marriage saving.
She does not need to read any book that is telling you how to be a stronger man. Those are tools for you! Here's the thing, if she read it then whenever you would try to implement what the book suggested, she would immediately fire back with something about not using that tough stuff on her b/c it wasn't going to work. In other words, the power in your actions are lost if she knows you are just doing something you read in a book. This is not just some self-help book to share with your WW.
It is not about what you feel should work in your M. It is about doing the work that gets the right results. Do what works!
