Still Navigating

[Georgiabelle]

G,

I’m sorry you’ve had a rough day. Some days are just emotional. It’s okay-all of us have those days where we feel like a giant dodo bird is pooping on our head.

You’ve received some fantastic and wise advice from everyone. Don (hi Don!) makes a great point. I have hooked up with a guy a few times over the last 5 months. If you had told me 5 years ago I would do this, I would tell you that you weee crazy. He’s funny, hot and a playa. I know that. So, I don’t think even though I’m
considered very attractive (for my age) , that the 45 yr old woman with 3 kids will be the one to capture his heart. However, he reaches out either daily or at least every other day. We talk about sports, work, etc. We are friends on some level. I’m not delusional. :-) This isn’t going to become anything more. I don’t think anything you do or have done will make a difference in HC wanting a R. Don is spot on when he says it doesn’t matter if you have sex, don’t have sex, initiate contact of not. I think this will not blossom into what you are looking for and doesn’t mean you aren’t good enough. You are fabulous, beautiful, warm anc funny but you must start seeking people who want what you want. There is no way around that.

Maybe I’m wrong but I always feel like if people want to reach out, they do. How hard is it to send a “hi” text? It’s not. If HC wants to know how you are, he will ask. So I may be the dissenter in saying that bringing to his attention that you feel like you are out of sight and out of mind when you aren’t around isn’t really what you want to bring up. I wouldn’t because I honestly think HC (and he sounds like a great guy) knows that he can reach out to you. He just chooses not to and I hope that doesn’t sound harsh. I think what you really want to know is if he thinks this can be what you want. And i think you know that answer.

As far as the making him “work” for it, I’m not sure what he’s “working” for? Sex? I think you want that as well so you could stop having sex with him but I don’t think that’s going to make him want a R. Which is what you want and that is a good thing. He’s just not that guy.

I hope I didn’t sound heartless. This just seems straight forward to me. And yes, I’ve been there as most of us have where we wanted something the other person didn’t. It’s painful and su$&y. It feels like rejection and that’s a horrible feeling.

Hang in there. Xo