I had given myself a bit of cooling time. To make sure i wasnt reacting on emotion. We hung out, he helped me with something. And we joked around a bit. Came to the conclusion that had i just said, "stop acting like an ahole" he would have stopped and apologized. He told me he is trying to learn more about how i work so he doesnt make mistakes. I told him about my wants in a relationship and he was very open to them. I never told him my wants before. I was afraid to. I also told him that i am the type of person that lives in my head. He said he figured that out already. So i am feeling pretty good.
I think my big fear is being powerless and not validated and entering into a relationship with someone that does not want to meet my needs. I was scared that the way he argued with me, meant that he was not going to meet my needs.
I have no fear of living without excitement, or newness. I am not looking for a movie star or prince charming. I am looking for someone that will be a partner. But at the same time i am healing from very unhealthy relationships and having trouble navigating and communicating.
