Can I really do this #4

[Dtrmned]

Is this normal?

Rough night last night. Nothing at all happened when I got home. It was a little nasty outside so had to do my evening workout inside. My D had a friend over that ended up spending the night so other than getting them some snacks and dinner together, an uneventful evening. W and I went up a little earlier than usual so D and her friend could watch a movie.

I had the most vivid dream I have had in a long time. It wasn't anything crazy. Just a replay pretty much of what my W and I are going through. There was an argument that, of course, stemmed from nothing and ended up in a heated situation. I couldn't control myself in my dream. I remember thinking to myself and trying, but I couldn't stop. Jolted myself awake at 2 am and just felt the entire situation through my body and soul. It was crushing. Since I was jolted awake, it was difficult to attempt to relax and go back to sleep. I also couldn't really leave the room as the only other area to go to was where the girls were crashed. I meditated for awhile and told myself that it was just a dream, it didn't really happen, and it shouldn't affect anything. WAY too tough to do for me. I managed a little bit more rest and then during my morning workout, couldn't get it off of my mind.

Did my morning routine, wished my wife to have a good day and she said the same, and headed off to work.

No idea where this came from. Ideas are appreciated.

Where I am is truly "I don't know what to do". I don't know how long I can hang on. I am working on detaching, but it seems like I can't fulfill the true detachment when we are in the same home. We rarely communicate during the day. We rarely speak that much in the evening. We do our usual summer routine which is get the kids something when they want (no scheduled dinner time due to playtime and fun for them), we both don't generally eat dinner together as we both rarely eat a meal in the evening, mostly snacking. We do our things and settle in and watch some tv together, followed by us both shutting down the house and heading up to bed at the same time, and of course in the same bed. Most of the time we will watch a quick comedy show to wind down a little more and then we call the evening together. We both say our goodnights and we are done.

Cycle starts the next day as we get up early (I, so I can work out prior to going to work, her, mostly due to her health issues and needing her heating pad). I do my thing, get ready, wish her a good day, she does the same, and I am headed off.

I know this is the exact definition of limbo. She isn't doing anything and I am tolerating the situation (I don't know how else to describe the sitch other than that).

My question and looking for feedback on this please!
Am I just enabling her to get to a better place or position where she can bolt?
Am I just a schmuck that is too nice of a guy to cut this off and move on?
Am I just still so much in love with my W that I would sacrifice my dignity to stay with her even if we don't have a MR?
Should I give her the wake up call, file, and move this all forward in the chance that THIS might be her wake up call?

Small comment, I feel at times that I still makes things WAY too comfortable for her. She realizes I still am in love with her and knowingly or unknowingly is taking advantage of that. She also knows that her financial struggle truly begins when we part, so her "toleration" of me may be her way of keeping me on the line until Plan A comes together. Again, No PA that I possibly could think could be happening. Kids are home everyday, W is dealing with health issues, never leaves without the kids, never goes out in the evening, and 99 times out of 100 she hasn't changed out of her morning outfit, taken a shower, no makeup and her hair isn't done.

I realize that if I triggered and moved forward that the chance of a D are way greater than an R. I just don't know. My issue now is I am tired of this affecting every aspect of my life. Home, family, kids, W of course, WORK, and just the freedom to know I could go do something without worrying about some response (Not talking about dating, just talking out our MR as it used to be "Hey honey, I'm going to golf with the guys on Friday, I'll be home by dinner, let me know if you need me to get you anything on my way home". No asking for permission, just the understood bonds between a husband and a wife with normal life. I now seem to have to worry about even the slightest situation that arises.

Again, your opinions are greatly wanted and appreciated!