I know what you mean about wanting the kids to not like it with W so they will want to spend more time with you.

I felt that too after BD when my W wanted to see her kids at OM’s house. Outwardly I acted, but inside I hurt and wanted the kids too hate it there. Well her visits didn’t last very long, and I watch the hurt in my children’s eyes as their mother didn’t want them anymore.

I got it. I found grace and forgiveness. Imagine how messed up you need to be to throw away your own children. What else can I do, but forgive. She doesn’t know it and she probably doesn’t deserve it. It doesn’t matter, forgiveness is for me. I love her enough to forgive and let her go. And hope she reaches out to her children.

Children have two parents, they love each one, and they do not want to choose. They get half of themselves from each, they know this. They do not want to dislike “half” of themselves.

You are on the right path. I see the passion when you talk about “what schedule is good for the kids”. Damn straight, none of this is good for the kids!

So you make it the best you can. You can see clearly sjohns6. Your kids are counting on you.

Keep walking the path.

Feelings are fleeting.
Be better, not bitter.
Love the person, forgive the sin.