Fmly1st, it's so hard to stabilize yourself when this happens. It sounds like you've held on and you're thinking and acting rationally despite the intense emotions that come with infidelity and uncertainty about the future. Your wife hasn't yet left home, she hasn't told her family, she hasn't filled out divorce papers - there's still a lot that has to happen if she wants to leave you for this other man. Even if she starts doing all those things she'll still realize that life after she destroys her family and starts over with the other man isn't the paradise and fantasy life that she expected. At some point along the way there's a high chance she'll come back to you, but it could take a while unless she or the other man suddenly break it off. During all that time you'll be working on becoming a better person, fixing things about yourself, looking even better and more confident, taking care of the kids and house....you're going to be a very attractive option later on. If you still want your wife back after going through that process I hope you'll get her back. It will never be the same but there's always hope.
