Had a nice weekend with D as always. At least when I have my D with me 2/3rd's of my life is complete. Continue to do a ton of self-reflection and an "action plan" of ways that I feel I could be a better partner in a future relationship. It's important to build the list for myself and the future. If I examine the list against the past it's too easy to assume all fault for the failure of my MR and that leads to a spiral. As far as W...I find myself less thinking on the specifics of our MR and more on the just HOW a spouse can simply walk away from a MR without giving it every chance. I realize ultimately that no matter what I think, those are the cards that have been dealt me. I just can't rationalize W's complete reluctance to talk (no phone calls, meet ups, can't look me in the eye) to any other reason than there being an OM.
I have progressed in the almost 5 months since BD. I have met some other ladies who give me hope for the future if I ever decide to try a relationship again, I know time has detached me somewhat from W and so has the talk of D process, but I'm aware I'm still very much a work in progress with that. Just trying to focus on me and my D and making a new life for us given the new reality. It's interesting to me how W has gotten angrier and less rational as the time apart has gone by. I would have expected the opposite given how she is getting what she wants. It will be nice to be done with all of her drama beyond co-parenting. It's amazing how much W's actions have helped push me on through detaching from her, but it's true.
