But it was just dating for me. I dont think it was just dating for NG either. We both are looking for family and committment and someone to grow old with. I kind of feel like maybe he made me into family too quickly.
I dont even know what i am feeling.
I was comparing him to my mother...even my mom noticed the similarity between them when i was telling her the issues.
I hate living with my mom. I am dependent on her. And i understand its her house, things get done her way. She is a mess and diaorganized, yet finds fault with me and my mistakes and its just hard. She makes a big deal out of them and its a tough way to live.
I will give an example.. i threw away a bottle that belonged in recycle in the regular garbage. Instead of just correcting the mistake and throwing it in the recycle bin she takes it out. Brings it in my room and place a note that says "i belong in recycle" i would understand this if she had a super clean and organized home, but she doesnt.
Now i am sure she is annoyed because we are living there and she was not planning on this for her returement. She likes to conplain that shes not everyones maid...but shes really not. She just gets annoyed with me for using the swiffer jet (hates the smell) that i dont jam pack the dish washer before turning it on etc. Etc. But she was always like this with us. I am not perfect either and i get it. But she focuses on my flaws instead of her own and it just gets so annoying.
When my ex first left. I was more angry that he left me in a position in which i needed to be back with my mom. He even told me "i feel bad for you that you lived that way with her" because he lived with us for a year and saw what she was like. Yet he still left me and my son in that arrangement.
If i was like most of the other peopke on here, living in an affordable area in which i could have some semblence of independence and dignity i would not be suffering like i am. I really believe this.
NG is similar with his daughter and i worry i would just be exiting 1 bad situation for another. I
