I just got back... We did a polite joke at first. I noticed that she couldn't look me in the eyes at all. I thought it was because she wanted to hide that she was sad and/or guilty. She seemed agitated with the kids. I have noticed that she is getting more grumpy with them at times. The kids seemed a bit sad too. I think they are now really missing us a lot as a family.
W was packing a lot of stuff away (long story). I asked "Would you like any help?" I knew that she would not be happy with me if I didn't offer and I thought she'd refuse if I asked so I was in a no-win situation. She said no but I could to help by taking the youngest into the school, so I did. W said she would be a little late going into the school for the event due to her putting stuff away. She was, and she stayed by the door (where it was cooler) rather than sit with the other parents inc. me.
School kids were given awards. One was for honesty in everything they did, another for being a good actor going from evil monster to very happy person within a moment. I had to laugh. Another award was for perseverance and the award giver said how it was the most important word in learning.
I noticed that W looked sad. The happy fake smiles she always does had gone. She looked troubled. She didn't look dressed for work as if she was having the day off. My guess is that she's going to a legal person today to start D or a day with A (if so).
At the end, I could see W leaving in the corner of my eye. I walked up the road and she stopped the car. She must have gone to the car very quickly. She said she would call me about Sunday, then said no need and just confirmed what we have already arranged. I mentioned there was an outstanding bill (that she had said she would pay weeks ago but hasn't). W claimed she would phone right away to pay it all off but then she said it might take a few days for them to confirm it as paid. Ummm... I don't believe her.
I looked as good as possible, genuinely smiled, not much else I could have done. There's something major going on, I can sense it. I think she's going for D asap. That would be a problem as there wouldn't be enough time to sort herself out. I can tell that she is changing. When she left 2 months ago, she was all smiles as if everything was going to be great for her. Now she looks sad as if reality is just starting. Knowing her, she won't change her mind even if she wanted to do so because she is so stubborn and her parents are willing her on.
I notice that you spend a lot of your posts trying to read her mind and guess whats going on. I feel like it is fueling you to make decisions that are based on these conjectures rather than facts. I think it is putting wayyyyyy too much of your focus on her.
I think maybe it would be better to try to stop with so much of this mindreading and really consider only concrete details and facts you know to be true.
To be fair... this is spot on, but nothing he has not been told in posts before this unfortunately.
There needs to be a change in mentality on his part or this is being to be a long painful road.
