Amoafwl, thanks again. I hear ya, it's just one thing knowing what I should be doing and another one managing to do it.
I am sat here working away, trying to concentrate on the job but my mind keeps wandering. To where she might be right now, and what she is doing.
I am struggling to keep busy as I so quickly seem to run out of energy when I am with other people, and all I want to do is go back home. I haven't been going out much at all in our married life, and I never really missed it much, I guess I am a bit of a hermit anyways, so it is hard to force myself. Also, because of the impending move, I am trying not to spend money I might need for a rent deposit or covering both places for a while until the house is sold, so I feel guilty for even just going for a drive.
I think, things will get easier once I am out of here, it will remove the "waiting for her to come home", which I always used to do and which is hard to stop right now. I am looking at a flat on Monday, fingers crossed I'll get it and can start moving on and start focussing on myself and my future.
Also, hopefully, she is going to visit her family for a few days, as her mum is in hopsital (I don't really know how to handle that either, I want to be there and comfort her, but that is not my place anymore), so I get some alone time with the dogs and some rest from the "waiting for her".
