This is awesome. The only problem with it is how sorely it will tempt almost every single LBS who reads it to send it to his/her spouse or to his/her spouse's best friend.

Don't worry, I won't! But boy do I want to.

I believe I will see the bounty of the Lord in the land of the living.
Wait for the Lord with courage.
Be stouthearted, and wait for the Lord.