Still Moving (Saying ILY Pt 7)

[mtb1981]

W sent a text earlier today letting me know that one of her new friends she started hanging around when this whole sitch started passed away last night. He was walking by some train tracks and got hit by a train. Her text read, "I wanted to let you know. I know you didn't know him well, but I thought you should know" along with link to an article about the accident. I replied with "Oh no! That [censored]. I'm sorry" I kind of feel bad for her and want to be supportive, but I realize that's not my job anymore. I feel my response to her was appropriate...

[OrangeK]

WOW.

I mean, [censored] for that guy, but wow.

Was yesterday "Official WW desperate excuse to reach out day"???

[mtb1981]

I don’t know. It she has been trying to have more contact the last week. I have a feels by it has something to do with being served the divorce papers and trying to be more present due to the custody I was requesting. She wants 50/50, but at the same time, she can’t even keep the kids one night a week because she says she is working all the time. How does she expect to have them half the time if this is the precedent she has set? Pretty sure she’s just interested in getting child support and not looking like a crappy mom. If she actually cared about the kids right now, she would make a real effort to see them...

[Vanilla]

It too will pass.

V

[LoneWlf]

mtb - keep doin what you are doin. Be the solid parent. Always be there for your kids. (I know you have) Stay strong -Stay Well!!

[mtb1981]

Uggh... Going through some papers and stuff in the bedroom and just came across a bunch of cards and letters from my W from the past. Made the mistake of reading some of them. I feel like I've just been kicked in the emotional testicles. Such loving words and thoughts about her love for me and how great I was for always sticking by her side and being her rock. Yet, here we are now. I really could have done without that...

[bhappy2]

mtb, use that as a learning experience, see some old things do not start reading and bringing all that emational stuff up.

You are doing a great job with your children do not get side tracked. Be well, do some fun stuff!

[SteveLW]

mtb, that is difficult. So hard not to read them and reminisce when you come across them. I've been there, did the same thing in January.

Hang in there..........this is part of the process.

[mtb1981]

Thanks, everyone. I'm over it. It just $ucks that it happened. I was just caught off guard. Side note - last night I had a get together with a few friends and told them to invite whoever they wanted to. Met a lot of cool new people. The local rock star showed up and put on an impromptu concert as well. A good time was had by all. Spent some time talking to a really cool lady and had some great conversation. Really made me realize that there are a lot of opportunities out there. I'm in no way wanting to start dating or anything, but it was really nice to know that there are a lot of available people that are out there and show interest in me as well. To top it off, the time I spent talking to her, was better than any convo I had with my W for years. Really put things into perspective...

[DB346]

I had a similar experience a few weeks ago on a plane. I was sitting next to a really pretty girl and we ended up having a great conversation the entire flight. It was so nice to have a complete stranger show more interest in who I am and what I do than my W has in a VERY long time. It made me realize just how lonely I had been, even before W left me. It was kind of a turning point that made me see that I will be OK eventually, and with or without my W, I will be even happier. Separation and divorce are horrible, but we will all come out the other side stronger, just like all the others before us. We just have to put in the work on ourselves and fight through the pain.